#i want to eat 7 carrots

[i-will-steal-your-intestines]

carrot…a carrot…carrot, oh, carrots PLEASEEE

[5sospenguinqueen]

Bedtime Stories | Daniel Ricciardo x Author! Reader

Summary: For the past six years, you've been dreaming of a future with Daniel. Until one silly little interview shatters every illusion.

Warnings: Swearing. Angst. Baby fever. End of a relationship. Daniel bashing.

Female reader with various faceclaims. Takes place in the 2022 season.

Main Masterlist

next.

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User 2 no, it's not an announcement. her best friend is currently pregnant and she was gushing about looking forward to aunty duties

User 3 omg her and daniel would make the cutest babies though

→ User 4 i bet she can't wait until they have their own mini-me

User 5 imagine our rom-com queen going from writing the cutest but filthiest fiction imaginable to writing about why you should eat your carrots

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22•05•22

User 6 i can't believe this man was talking about being in the height of his career when he's been nothing but a flop since leaving red bull

User 7 the way he's been stringing this poor woman along for 6 years, knowing how badly she wants children, to then decide in a random interview that he's never going to have kids because they would be a 'distraction'

User 8 fans spotted y/n running from the pits once she saw that daniel was safely done with racing

User 9 i fear we may be witnessing the downfall of something we once held sacred

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16•06•22

fallontonight just posted

liked by YourUserName, kellypiquet and others

fallontonight did you know @ YourUser Name was once chased by a kangaroo? find out how in tonight's episode of The Tonight Show 📚🦘

4,477 comments

YourUserName thanks for having me! ✨

User 11 excuse me, ma’am, reassess what

User 12 daniel has been absent from her last 3 posts

→ User 1 not even in the likes or comments

→ User 2 and he didn't even congratulate her on the recent book launch

→ User 3 ya’ll are reaching. he's busy racing. she's busy doing book promo. they still follow each other

User 4 anyone notice she didn't look as happy as she usually does

→ User 5 yes! and i swear she got teary when talking about her life plans 🥺

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YourUserName just posted

liked by maxverstappen1, mclaren and others

YourUserName my happy place 🌊🐚🦀 Aug '22

4,990 comments

User 6 does this mean a new book is coming soon

→ User 7 girl, we’ve just had one. let the woman rest

→ YourUserName sorry, my lovelies but i don’t think i'm in the right headspace to being right a romance novel at this time

→ User 6 confirmation??!?!

→ User 7 we’re children of divorce

→ User 8 honestly fuck those two because i couldn’t have cared less about vroom vroom boys until mother started dating one and now i'm crying in class ‘cause they’re over

landonorris get that bread, queen 🍞

→ YourUserName who let you out of daycare

→ User 9 not y/n and lando interacting like she didn’t break his teammates heart

→ User 10 more like his teammate broke y/n’s heart. let's not make daniel out to be the victim here

kellypiquet p said get writing those children’s books so she can brag about aunty y/n to her friends

→ YourUserName my sweet girl. i saw the cutest dress the other day for her so I’ll pop round soon x

→ User 11 i love their friendship

→ User 12 get this woman a child. She’s too sweet to be stuck in cool aunt mode forever

User 13 anyone notice she didn't do her annual birthday post for daniel?

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04•09•22

User 14 no because the interviewer was so real for that. checo has a few children and he’s currently 2nd best. max is nowhere to be seen on the grid he's that far ahead and he makes sure p is his priority when she’s there so???

→ User 15 and the way he stormed out. i bet PR are sooo happy with him

User 16 nah because mclaren recently announced that they’re not extending his contract so he currently doesn't have his seat and doesn't have his y/n, all because he thought he was better than that

YourUserName posted a new story

danielricciardo posted a new story

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danielricciardo just posted

liked by landonorris, estebanocon and others

danielricciardo yesterday was something. p17 wasn't the result we were expecting, and the media were a challenge but it's always a delight to be in Suzuka. Moving on to the Americas

5,509 comments

User 1 maybe if y/n was there, you wouldn't have done so badly

User 2 maybe if he had a baby waiting in the paddock he would’ve had more incentive to do better

mclaren we’ll get them next time 💪

User 3 letting mclaren and lando down

→ User 4 the real reason he and y/n broke up is because he has no wins. she should move onto lando or something

→ User 5 he’s way too young for her

→ User 4 they'd make a good looking couple tho

(comments have been disabled for this post)

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19•10•22

YourUserName just posted

liked by charles_leclerc, bloomsburypublishing and others

YourUserName thirty, flirty and thriving. please enjoy a small snippet of my 30th birthday, organised by my favourite girl. these are the nice moments before she plies me full of cocktails and i become the sloppiest person in monaco tagged: kellypiquet

kellypiquet any chance to celebrate you 🤍🤍

→ kellypiquet and an even better chance to drink the entire bar and force max to carry us home

→ maxverstappen1 i'm just glad i was able to pull you both out of the sea before you drowned

landonorris can't believe you tried (and failed) to stop us from gatecrashing

→ YourUserName it was an exclusive event, we don't let randos in

→ landonorris i know you're joking but it still hurts my feelings

maxverstappen1 happy birthday, sloppy. you don't look a day over 40

→ YourUserName i'm gonna let that slide but only because i love the bag that kelly told you to buy

User 7 happy birthday to the best author

User 8 happy birthday queen

carlossainz55 happy birthday, y/n 💐

liked by YourUserName

danielricciardo happy birthday x

User 5 kelly and y/n look like the funnest people to hang out with

→ User 6 literally need to know how to become part of their duo

lewishamilton happy birthday, y/n. have a lovely night 💕

liked by YourUserName

mclaren happy birthday to papaya's favourite author (we're still waiting for a racing rom-com that is quite clearly about your favourite f1 team and their super sexy admin) 🥳🥳

liked by YourUserName

Request are open!

Baby Fever Angst Series

[yumenosakiacademy]

uuu its better 2 eat a breakfast n lunch but im lack self-control n always wanna eat most of my day’s allowance at the start of the day so tht im not craving it later so i tend 2 jus eat a way-too-big brunch then a small or moderate dinner, like i shouldnt...

[tartagliove]

7:30pm

bakugou katsuki x reader ✧ fluff ✧ 0.6k

These pajamas are extra soft against your skin. You fiddle with the hem of your shirt, delighted with rubbing the material between your fingers, as you follow the sound of running water to the kitchen.

Bakugou paints a pretty picture, standing in front of the sink and scrubbing at a dirty pan, muscles flexing under his black tank top. You walk up to him and slip your arms around his waist, leaning your head against the broad expanse of his back. His aggressive scrubbing decreases in intensity and you snuggle more comfortably against him.

“Thank you for dinner, Katsuki,” you say. “It was delicious.”

The food he makes is always delicious. When you returned home from work tonight, the air wrapped you with the comforting warmth and mild spiciness of curry. The bowl Bakugou set before you had been piping hot. The carrots, potatoes, and beef melted in your mouth, settling nicely in your stomach as his food refueled you after a long day.

“It’s nothing.” Your thanks warms him, but he shrugs it off because he doesn’t want you to make it a big deal. As he rinses off the pan, Bakugou asks, “You feeling better now?”

A soft smile grows on your face at his question. “Mhm, eating your food helped. I’m not as tired anymore.”

“Good.” 

You shuffle a few steps to the right as Bakugou moves to wipe the bottom of the pan and put it on the stove to dry. A giggle leaves your lips as you walk back to the sink with him, never letting go all the while. He starts on the dishes and you once again relax against his warmth.

If you were looking at Bakugou’s face, you would have seen the softest, calmest expression appear at the sound of your mirth filling the kitchen.

“Ah, wait!” You move to stand beside Bakugou. “It’s supposed to be my turn to do the dishes tonight. I can’t believe you started them while I went to change.”

He snickers as you pout at him. “You snooze, you lose, slowpoke.”

“You suck.” Sticking your tongue out at him, you try to push him to the side with your hip but he doesn’t budge. “Let me clean the rest of these, at least. You cooked tonight, so you should rest.”

“No. Go back to clinging to me like a damn leech.”

You laugh, but then complain, “A leech? At least choose something cuter, like a monkey. Ooh, or a koala!”

Still, you snuggle into Bakugou’s side as he rinses off the plate. He complains halfheartedly about you being in the way, but doesn’t nudge you off him. When he turns off the water and is about to move to dry the plate, you perk up and grab it from him before drying it off yourself. He frowns.

You smile at him sweetly. “Let me dry the dishes, Katsuki, so we can get them done faster. Then I can go back to being your human backpack for the rest of the night.” The last few words make you laugh.

He stares you down, red eyes piercing, before he gives in with a slight nod and turns back to the sink. With running water and the occasional clinking of cutlery forming the melody of the evening, you work in comfortable silence with Bakugou. Soon, the rest of the dishes are clean and tucked away. You get to spend the rest of the evening leaning into Bakugou’s warmth on the couch, dozing off as you watch a baking show together.

requested by @pikatsum for my camping event. reblogs/comments are much appreciated!

[hotvintagepoll]

Hello! Do you have a favorite winter recipe? I'm looking to expand my repertoire, because I've only lived in a climate that snows for a couple years, and I don't have enough cozy, bone warming foods!

PS - I keep having to feed my cat pumpkin puree because he has some tummy troubles but he will only eat it if I gently hand feed him with a spoon. Just thought you might enjoy that.

YES HERE IS JOYOUS SOUP

(i have never actually called it joyous soup but it's what i feel everytime i make it and i feel like everyone should make it)

This soup does not have a proper recipe because uhh, my mom is bad with recipes but ALSO this soup truly adapts to whatever you have in your fridge, as long as you have 1) some kind of oil or butter to sautee things with and 2) potatoes. this is the sam gamgee make-it-on-the-side-of-a-mountain-winter soup.

Step 1. Take your potatoes—6 is the ideal but 4 works—and chop them up rough. "What kind of potatoes?" Whatever they have on the side of the mountain, Sam. You now have a bunch of 1" potato chunks or discs (I like discs). I assumed you washed them first but if you forgot you can wash them now.

Step 2. Get your oil or butter sizzling. I use about two tablespoons of butter to start and add more as I go if the potatoes don't look fully covered. I am probably cooking the butter on medium.

Step 3. You're putting the potatoes in the butter. You're pretending to fry them. Watch them get all buttery and golden and a little brown and crispy. You're thinking, man, I could eat these as they are right now. You could do that. Don't. Add garlic and onions if you have them. Add lots.

Step 4. Just as you're like oh MAN these potatoes and garlic and onions look really good fried just like this, you're going to swamp them in water. You're going to stare at what you've done and thought you made a mistake. You have not. The water should just be covering the potatoes and now you've turned the water up to high, staring at your weird sad soup pot, that smells deliciously of butter garlic onions and potatoes.

Step 5. In another saucepan, you are melting more butter (or oil, or what have you) and figuring out what else you have in your cupboard. Carrots? Those can go in. Parsnips could too. Spinach works nicely. Any onions or garlic you forgot can be added again now. Mushrooms are fucking fabulous. Leeks? Sublime. The only veg you should be avoiding are the ones that are secretly fruits (no watery tomatoes or squishy cucumbers) or the ones that you think are insipid (celery).

Step 6. You're chopping all of that up as much as you like and browning it up in the butter. You're also adding whatever spices strike your fancy. I love salt, so that's always going in, but I usually add black pepper and cayenne, and then I get fruity with it and start adding in paprikas and cumins and turmerics or corianders and thymes and basils and parsleys. It all depends on what smells right to you combined with the steams you're making, and how much spice you want kicking you later.

Step 7. How are your boiled potatoes looking? Are they soft yet? Good. Can you stick a fork in them yet, and has the water boiled down to almost nothing? Excellent. How are all your buttery brown vegetables looking? If you want to give up the whole experiment and eat them right out of the pan, it's time to make another mistake and add all your gorgeous browned vegetables to your disastrous wet potato pot.

Step 8. You now have a lot of delicious stuff looking wet and sad in your potato pot. Pour in a bit more water (or veg broth, or stock if you have it) and stir that all up. Let it stew together a bit and combine flavors. Turn it back down to medium so you don’t scorch any of your nice wet veg things. If you're fancy like my mom, you get out an immersion blender here. If you're broke and possess your grandmother's food processor, like me, you're pouring that all into the food processor with the biggest blade you have and turning it into a smoothie. If your concoction seems oddly chunky you need to add more water.

Step 9. Wet sad potato smoothie is not much to look at but now you're adding CREAM. and CHEESE. and MORE SPICES TO YOUR TASTE. If you don't have cream MILK WORKS FINE. If you don't have cheese THAT IS OKAY. If you like your soup with chunks LEAVE OUT SOME OF YOUR VEG NEXT TIME and ADD IT IN HERE. At this point, you have a gorgeous creamy soup that's soft and luscious (that's the potatoes), includes all your favorite veg (that's everything you got out of the fridge), and can go in any number of taste directions depending on what spices you put in (I've made this with Indian spices, English herb garden spices, Mexican spices, Hungarian spices—every time it's delicious and works a different way).

Step 10. I hope you have a lot of bread because you're going to be dipping it in your soup saying :) man this is a nice soup :) and knowing you can make it whenever you have weird leftovers, as long as you have potatoes and butter. and what else does a person need in life than potatoes and butter?

enjoy your joyous soup <3 i may have forgotten several steps but as long as you follow -brown some veg -add water -add spice -blend the shit out of it, you can never really go wrong <3

[adviceformefromme]

Personal health hacks that have completely changed my life in the last 9 months.

Absolute number one is removing carbs from my diet. I had THE WORST crashes and lethargy every single day after my morning oat meal, after my carb heavy lunch, and carb heavy dinner. Despite being vegan my body lacked nutrients and calories from under-eating being plant-based and carb-overloading. 

Introducing grass-fed meat and high quality eggs into my diet. Red meat gets such bad press in the media, but personally it has given me energy, strength and I feel much better eating this in moderation. 

Little exercise each day. Not killing myself with a hardcore workout and then not being able to move for rest of the week (which I was doing previously). I now do a little each day. 1.5 - 2mile run most days, and daily stretches and weights at home. Nothing crazy, but a little goes a long way and I find it much easier to be consistent doing smaller bouts on my own schedule daily. 

Hormone health, ensuring I am keeping my hormones balanced. I make watermelon juice daily with 1.5 heaped tablespoons of flaxseed. Alongside that. I take omega 3, DIM, Selenium, Iodine, Vitamin D +K2, Evening primrose oil for womens health. I eat foods that support healthy hormones, broccoli, carrots, sunflower seeds and removed the foods that cause imbalances (carbs, sugars).

Removing all stress from my life. Including moving overseas, deleting social media and keeping my circle small but wholesome. 

Quit drinking alcohol. Initially I thought I would have the occasional drink but I truly have no desire anymore. My life is significantly better for not drinking. My body never responded well to booze. 

Sleeping properly for 7-9 hrs per night. Meditating for 1 hour before bed usually puts me in a completely zen mode for relaxation. That means my phone is switched off, I use a lavender pillow spray and light candles to set the mood for a goodnight sleep. 

Zeolite detox for heavy metals (currently in the process). I have Zeolith Med powder each day with water to flush out any toxins. 

Learning about gut microbiome, and probiotics..in the process of obtaining kefir grains to make my own batch. Making sauerkraut on weekends and introducing a wider variety of foods into my diet. 

These are completely personal and I can honestly say I feel better than ever. I wish I had done the above years ago, especially the carbs! I got a continuous glucose monitor of Amazon to see how my body was responding to carbs before I completely cut them off and I recommend doing this if you want to know more about how your body is reacting to glucose. 

*this all took time and effort, but once I removed the distractions, the meaningless socialising, the boozing, the scrolling I’ve had time to invest in myself + my health

[rzyraffek]

Slashers with housewife s/o

(She/her)(swf) I was writing it for hour and it didnt save tnere is a lot of dialogue this color is slasher talking and this one is s/o. Its mostly written for fun Request open

Thomas Hewitt

P r o t e c t

He is triple cousious with his victims now! He would not forgive himself if one of them hurt her! And I dont thinl s/o likes gore so dont go near basement hon pls

*tommy vibing outside* "Uhhh Tommy? Theres some guy in livingroom" 🤨😨

Even tho she is hausewife he is hausehusband so yall Just vibe while cooking and cleaning

The Micheal Myers

"Micheal make sure to wear something under this jumpsuit, its cold outside!"

S/o getting him a phone and texting him every second he's out

Please Micheal stop killing people in our livingroom, this carpet costs more that my kidney

Once he gave her a knife he stole from some girl that tried to Defend herself

I can imagine s/o texting him stuff like "at 5pm u better be home, i made your favorite food" he will speedrun to home, he loves food

Collector

*phone rings at 3am* "Honey why you calling me, im at work?" "ASA THERE IS HUGE SPOODER IN BATHROOM HELP I CANT PEE" "omygod not again"

Due to s/o being often home alone (he is busy man) she will probably find some sort of hobby?(obviolusly) I can see her learning how to do crocheting. LIKE IMAGINE: "Asa i made you this cute sweater Look!" (There are to ways he will answer that) option1: "yeaah thanks that suuuper cute will wear it for sure"(never wears it) option 2: "what kind of abomination is that"(will wear it at work)

Bonus points if the oomgomgomg IF SHE MAKES SWEATER WITH MOTHS ON IT OR COCKROACHES (you know the funny gif with spining cockroach?yep this one) HE WILL LOVE IT(secretly) He would love to wear it to work but Hes afraid of destorying it (No, because imagine Arkin living in hell and the guy that tortures him for months just cames in cute sweater with cockroaches on it)

Yaujta

"??? Mate u mean u want to stay here and take care of nest while I go out??? I mean sure? Eem take care??" Confused af, like in his culutre both partners Hunt and tbh theres non long lasting relationships, only to make babis so it is weird.

He wants her to stay by his side 24/7 so he will be grumpy

But idea of her making amazing food while he is out just for him is too good to pass

Especally if its made of foods that he hunt, brings him pride

Imagine learning him how to use fork "nono honey u grab it like that and stab the food. Nono gently nonoo oh noo *break plate* "why use that when im litteraly apex predator hon imma-*eats whole plate of food with plate*

Billy lenz

F o o d

He loves food she makes

She hangs out in house so its win-win.

He will hug her alot and try to take her attencion from whatever she does to him!!

"Billy go help me chop carrorts for dinner!" *billy speedruning from upstairs* "🥺whar are carrots?"

Brahms Heelshie

"Mmm :) " "Brahms stop staring at me and help me clean kitchen' "yes honey :("

He does not rule in this relationship

He may act intimitading but He is just a shy bean

He does not know how to food, he will try to eat uncooked potato while shes not looking mmm forbiden apples

Hush man

Hes into that, prefers his wife to be like that

He loves picking her up and runinning arond hause

No matter how long yall are into relaionship he will be nervous before any dinner u eat together or be so happy everytime he sees her after he comesback home

Found it in my drafts!

[spicycinnabun]

pt. 1 3 4 5 6 7 💐

The second time Eddie stopped by Harrington Floral, it was because it was his mom’s birthday.

Each year, he bought a dozen Black-eyed Susans, her favorite wildflower, and placed them on her grave. He’d also eat a piece of carrot cake in her honor with Uncle Wayne.

The carrot cake was usually store-bought because he and Wayne were both hopeless in the kitchen, but this year, Eddie was going to try and make her recipe from scratch.

He felt like he owed it to her, and he needed to overcome his fear of the oven if he was ever going to survive on his own. She’d want that for him. Growth. Adulthood.

He had a brown bag full of groceries in one arm, carrot tops hanging over the side as he entered the store.

There was a new display in the window now. This one was called When I Think of You, and it was an assortment of roses, all in various shades of pink and red.

It was a different florist than the brown-eyed beauty that ended up serving him, but Eddie heard a voice coming from the back.

“Rob, I told you I already watered the Anthuriums today. Now, you’ve gone and over-watered them. They’re very susceptible to rot. Be careful next time!”

“Alright, alright! Jesus,” the girl, Rob, responded. She rolled her expressive blue eyes, the freckles on her face standing out wildly around all the bright bouquets. “Flower nazi.”

Eddie wasn’t exactly in a laughing mood, not today, but it made his lips twitch.

Rob rang up Eddie’s flowers. “That’ll be seven ninety-five, please.”

As he handed over his cash and coins, Eddie saw the source of the cranky voice crouching over a potted plant, shaking a bag of fertilizer over the soil and muttering to himself.

Eddie’s head tilted. The flower nazi had a nice butt.

Rob cleared her throat—the fake kind that actually sounded like ahem—and shoved the bouquet and receipt under his nose. “Have a great daisy,” she told him flatly.

“Oh, I’m sure I will not,” Eddie said, taking them.

He walked out still feeling blue, but as he buried his nose in the bundle of Susans and smelled their sweet grassy aroma that reminded him so much of his mother, his steps became lighter.

🌷🪻🌻🌹

co-writing this with @batty4steddie 💕

[karlatakicker]

RUIN SPOILERS!!

i’m very attached to roxanne, and after the dlc i am very attached to cassie too! so here’s my thoughts on the both of them and why their relationship is just so unbelievably special to me

1. it’s implied that they both don’t really have any friends, as sad as it is. Roxanne says to Cassie in their conversation that she thinks that her friends will come to her party this time, which obviously means Cassie’s friends are either nonexistent or aren’t very nice. it’s also implied that Roxanne is disliked by the other children in the pizzaplex because of her desire to win and lack of empathy thus unawareness that children are upset by the idea of losing. so, the idea of them both becoming friends and acknowledging each-other is truly special if they have nobody else.

2. Roxanne’s desire to win on her race track is overridden by her kindness and feelings towards Cassie. in their conversation Roxanne remembers Cassie because she beat her twice on the track, which leads to Roxanne almost sounding proud despite being beaten which she usually expresses anger for. (I’ve been told this doesn’t mean what I think, Number 1 twice refers to Cassie’s birthday, but you can argue that it still shows something between them by the fact Roxanne is willing to say Cassie is Number 1, despite Roxanne constantly wanting to be Number 1.)

3. Cassie’s clear empathy towards Roxanne as her favourite - she pities and feels for Roxanne when she’s crying in the salon. despite seeing the horrid conditions that all the other animatronics are in, Roxanne as Cassie’s favourite is the only one she truly feels for.

4. Roxanne’s infatuation with herself does not inflict with her remembering details about Cassie. Roxy asking about and sharing Cassie’s love of carrot cake (and remembering her birthday) shows an attachment that Roxanne seems to have with no-one else, as thinking of herself does not conflict with thinking of Cassie.

5. in the cutouts of Cassie and Roxanne standing side by side, they’re mirrored. Cassie has similar makeup on to Roxy, and is holding her mirror the exact same way. Cassie wants to be exactly like Roxanne, to the point of copying her actions and being dolled up like her. these images of the two of them are simply to establish a connection between them, so it hurts a lot more when it comes down to de-activating Roxanne.

6. Roxanne, despite being so angered at the idea of not being pretty and being so damaged, has no hesitation in jumping to save Cassie despite possibly getting more damaged or even being completely broken because of it.

7. the line “it has been some time since i saw you last” can be interpreted as Roxanne had thought of Cassie since the last time she had been to the pizzaplex. it makes their reunion all that more heartbreaking because when Roxanne meets her again, it’s for Cassie to deactivate her.

8. Roxanne asking if Cassie had booked her party yet, is essentially Roxy asking if Cassie was going to come back and see her - Cassie, the only kid that Roxy is shown to have a connection with.

9. Cassie stroking Roxanne’s fingers before deactivating her, as if to give her the last comfort she’ll ever feel.

anyway that ends my rant. they’re just so special to me despite them having like 3 interactions. they are the true little sister/big sister animatronic and human pairing we needed. if I don’t get an ending where they’re sitting on the hill eating carrot cake, the developers are going to get a very strongly worded email.

(just to clarify months on from this post, the developers have received a very strongly worded email.)

[reigningqueenofwords]

Sure, Babe

Pairing: Bucky x Reader Word count: 1,173

Read on AO3

Bucky moved to lean on the kitchen doorframe. He watched you move around with ease. You were barefoot, wearing one of your favorite dresses, and an apron he had bought you years before. You’d mended that apron so many times since, and refused to ever replace it. Sure, you had others, but that one meant the most. Your hair was up in (what you called) a messy bun, however he thought it was beautiful on you. He could see your favorite earrings dangling slightly from your ears. They were nothing fancy, some fake pearl earrings you’d bought online, but they made you feel beautiful. He didn’t need to see your face to know your makeup was minimal- mascara and some lipstick or lipgloss. Even now, 6 months pregnant, you did your little morning routine before the kids got up.

“Mommy!” He smiled as you turned to your youngest, Hannah, come running in the backdoor. 

“Yes, baby?” You smiled over at the 5 year old. Your smile turned to amusement. “You were playing in the mud, weren’t you?” You giggled. 

She nodded, eyes wide. She was covered in mud. “Nessa helped, too!” Nessa was your 7 year old. “She made me a mud crown.” She giggled, and her nose crinkled as she did. “Hi, daddy!” She beamed at him. She was missing one of her front teeth, making that grin extra adorable. 

You turned to him and smiled. Wiping your hands on a dishtowel, you went to kiss his cheek. “Care to clean up our children while I serve dinner? Just hose them down and wrap them in a towel. They can have a bath after.” You rubbed his chest. 

“Is Andy messy, too?” He asked about your oldest. He was 10, and it was touch and go with him playing with the girls. Some days he loved playing with his sisters. Other days he wanted nothing to do with him. 

“He has a book report coming up, so he’s up in his room reading.” You told him. “He promised them he’d play Go Fish with them later, though.” 

He chuckled, giving you a quick peck. “Alright, out back, munchkin.” He motioned for Hannah to head back out. “I’ll be right out, let me grab you two towels.” Life was never dull with them, that’s for sure. He chuckled as she ran back outside yelling for Nessa. “How’s our littlest one treating mommy today?” He asked, rubbing your bump. 

You smiled, looking down at where his hand was. “She’s good.” You put your hand on his. “Hoping she looks like her daddy, just like her siblings.” You loved that all three of your kids looked just like Bucky. There were little features that they got from you, but they got his dark hair, and his blue eyes. 

“I hope she is as beautiful as her momma.” He kissed your cheek before going to get those towels to hose off the girls. 

Watching him go, you bit your lip. You couldn't believe how lucky you were to have him, even though he constantly told you how he was the lucky one. 

Not long after, Bucky came in, a girl on each arm. “Hi, mommy!” Nessa giggled, pushing some hair out of her face. “Dinner smells yummy!” She gushed as she wiggled down to go see what was for dinner. 

“Thank you, Nessa.” You kept your eyes on what you were serving. “We’re having baked chicken, mashed potatoes, and sweet corn. And if you eat most of your dinner, I made brownies for dessert.” 

She gasped, excited. “The ones with the peanut butter?!” She asked, hopeful. 

You giggled at her excitement. “Peanut butter chunks .” You told her, getting her even more excited. Her favorite food ever was peanut butter. 

“Alright, let’s let momma finish plating dinner.” Bucky chuckled, coming over lifting her by the arm pits. She laughed as he carried her over to one of the chairs and put her down. 

Andy and Hannah had already climbed into their chairs, almost always loving your cooking. They weren’t a fan of carrots, spinach, or broccoli. You needed to sneak those things in, but they seemed to be okay with sweet corn and sweet peas. Oddly enough, they did like veggie lasagna, which contained all the veggies they didn’t like. 

Soon enough, you were all sitting around, ready to eat. “Baby, why do we all have more than you?” Bucky furrowed his brows. 

“It’s the end of the pay period, so groceries are a bit tight. You get the most because you work hard, the kids get a bit more because they’re growing and they need it.” You felt there was nothing wrong with that. “I have enough, and I’ll munch on what they don’t eat.” You assured him. 

“No, you should take some more of mine. You’re growing a human.” He got up to put some of his food on your plate. 

You raised an eyebrow at him. “You will park your handsome butt in that chair and eat. I’m eating enough, I promise. You do manual labor, and you need that food.” Your tone was loving, but let it be known that you would not back down. “It’s just a couple nights of this, and then we go grocery shopping. I’m fine, the baby is fine .” You assured him, taking a bite of his chicken. 

The kids were happily eating, not paying much attention to the pair of you. Bucky slowly sat back down. “But you’re getting the bigger brownie.” He pointed his fork at you. 

Smiling, you nodded. “Sure, babe.” You agreed, knowing that you’d give him part of it because you weren’t a huge fan of brownies. 

After dinner, Bucky told you to relax while he got the girls a bath. Most nights they did bathe separately, but tonight they got the joy of a bubble bath together. Andy put on a movie to watch while you started on the dishes from dinner. 

“Babe.” He sighed, hands on his hips as he saw you wiping down the kitchen. “That doesn’t look like relaxing.” He raised an eyebrow at you. 

You smiled at him, shrugging. “I was going to read while Andy watched a movie, but I wanted to knock this out. This way I have more time to relax with you.” You admitted. 

That softened him. “I’m off tomorrow. You will relax. I will do all the cooking and housework.” He went over to pull you to his chest. Your arms went around his neck. “And I’ll see if Ma will take the kids this Friday so we can have a date night. It’s been a few months.” 

“I don’t think we’ll top the last one, as I’m pretty sure that’s where I got pregnant with our little one.” You giggled. “Not that I am complaining one bit. I love being pregnant, and I love watching you with our kids.” You fell in love with him more every day. 

He kissed you softly, looking forward to the rest of his life with you.

[lialacleaf]

To Care For A Woman

Chapter 8

Summary: You join the army as a last-ditch effort to avoid destitution, but when you sustain an injury protecting Lieutenant Ghost and earn yourself a medical discharge, you're stuck all over again. Or maybe not...

Warnings: Tension, Simon wants to care for you, small reader, a little bit spicy but not NSFW, man worrying about a woman's safety, typical cannon violence, deception I'm sorry it's unedited...

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9

You were quiet while you watched him pack. It was always the moments right before he left that you felt the coldest. He hadn't even left yet, but something about watching him move Moonbeam off of his duffle bag for the hundredth time, patting the cat patiently on the head, made your chest ache.

It would be weeks before you saw him again. When he finally noticed you staring from the kitchen, he zipped his bag shut and padded across the living room to pull you into his arms.

"Won't be gone too long, love. Just some loose ends to tie up," he said, placing a kiss on your cheek.

It wasn't as if you wouldn't be busy while he was gone. You had physical therapy, gardening, and plenty of reading to keep yourself occupied until he was back.

You'd still miss him though. The lack of his gruff voice in your ear in the mornings, his arms around your waist, and the feeling of his chest pressed against your back. There was nothing quite like him.

"Tell Johnny I said hello," you murmured, tilting your head upwards to press a kiss against his lips. You knew for the next few months they would become chapped under the rough material of his balaclava.

"Will do."

"Keep each other safe."

Of course.

"Remember to eat something-"

"y/n,"

"I love you, Simon," you murmured.

He hummed softly in your ear as he squeezed you against his chest. "Love you more."

~

It was supposed to have been no longer than three weeks. You'd started calling base after the first month, asking if there had been any sign of his team.

Two months went by with no news, and your poor garden was the victim of your frustration as you aggressively dug up your potatoes and planted carrots. You were going to have a full pantry by the time Simon came home.

Moonbeam had been equally distressed by the lack of Simon's presence, and you found yourself snuggling the cat in bed most days, hoping you'd receive a call to come pick up your husband any day now.

You had just about succumbed to the idea of the third month coming to an end before Simon returned when you received a call from Captain Price, asking that you come to base as quickly as you could.

You had felt unease tighten in your stomach at his tone. The last time you'd received such a call, Simon had been in a horrible state, and you couldn't help but worry about your poor husband as you packed a thermos of tea for him and loaded into the truck.

The drive felt longer than usual, and you wished you could simply teleport directly to him. You pulled haphazardly into a parking spot and jumped out of the truck.

"Lass," Soap greeted you as he led you to Price's door. His face was somber, and he didn't attempt to make conversation.

You knocked softly on Price's door, and waited for a reply. The door opened to reveal the Captain, looking far more tired than you'd ever seen him.

"Sir? Is everything all right?" you asked.

"y/n, come in. Have a seat," he instructed, pressing his lips together firmly.

"Is Simon alright? Can I see him?" you asked desperately.

Price hung his head as he sat before his desk, running his bottom lip between his teeth.

"I...I'm so sorry, y/n,"he started, and your eyes narrowed. He pushed a folder towards you, sighing deeply. "These are all his assets. He left you everything."

He left you everything.

He left you.

"Simon wouldn't leave," you said, your lip wobbling.

"I truly appreciate what you did for him. I'm sure it wasn't easy loving someone like him. Someone like Ghost."

you shook your head, a sob breaking past your lips. "Where is he?" you begged.

Price swallowed thickly. "We couldn't bring you a body, I'm sorry. We were ambushed. The building went up in flames," he explained. "They knew we were coming."

"Where is he!" you sobbed, unwilling to believe he was gone.

Price simply shook his head, moving from his desk to pull you against his shoulder. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

~

You poured the tea from the thermos into the sink, feeling the tears run down your cheeks as you did so. You couldn't believe it. You had lost him. After everything you'd done to hold onto him, you'd lost him.

The cabin suddenly felt so much colder with the knowledge that he was never coming back. It stung in your chest, and suffocated your throat.

You had money, food, and everything you'd need to live, but you'd give all of it up in a heartbeat if it meant you could have him back.

You placed a hand on the kitchen counter as you fought back a sob.

"I want him back," you whispered. " I want him back!"

Your hand connected with the plain white mug on the counter and sent it flying into the wall, causing it to shatter.

"I want him back! I want him back!" you cried, falling to your knees as your fist pounded into the floor.

He was supposed to be untouchable. Supposed to come back to you. Now he really was his namesake.

You were supposed to be there to protect him, but you hadn't had his back when he needed it most. You'd never felt such a desire to throw your useless body down the stairs.

A soft meowing pulled you out of those dark thoughts, and you pulled Moonbeam into your lap with a sob. "He's not coming back," you whispered to the cat as if wishing the creature would somehow prove you wrong.

you received no answer as you lay amongst the debris of your tantrum on the kitchen floor.

~

The apparitions started shortly after that night you spent sobbing your heart out, begging your husband to come home, as if his Ghost would hear you and miraculously pull his body from the grave once more.

But maybe you had been all too successful in calling his Ghost to you. You felt as if you were being watched when you went into town for more meat. It was an itch in the back of your head that wouldn't disappear.

You could have sworn you saw his figure in the glass window of the shop, but when you turned around he wasn't there.

The shopkeeper raised a brow at you, and you quickly paid before hauling your groceries into the truck.

You couldn’t help but look behind you in the rear view mirror on the drive home, watching to see if you were being followed.

You felt a shift in the wind as you quickly made your way into the cabin, locking the door behind you.

You pulled Moonbeam into your lap as you sat on the couch, rubbing her soft fur as your hands shook.

You saw movement, something shadowy outside your window, and you could have sworn the moonlight reflected a white surface.

You had never seen yourself as the dependent type, but you wished Simon was there to hold you, to reassure you that nothing could harm you.

A loud banging sounded against the door, had you jumping out of your skin, and you ran to the bedroom for your pistol.

You wanted to see your husband again, but not if it meant being six feet under with him.

The banging continued, like an erratic drumbeat of death as the person pounded frantically at the door.

You gripped the hun in your hand, pointing it towards the entry as you threw the door open, prepared to defend yourself against…

The hun fell from your boneless fingers as a choked noise left your lips. Your eyes settling on the panting form before you, blood smeared on the skull mask, ash stuck to his jacket. Ghost.

Your Ghost.

“Simon?” You whispered, noting the wild, frantic look in his eyes. He wheezed a little, coughing as he took a shaky step towards you, his legs nearly buckling beneath him. He shut the door behind him, leaning against it as he slid to the floor.

Another cough racked his body, and a shaking, gloved hand reached for you. You grasped his hand, feeling your heart race inside your chest as you gently pulled his glove away from his hand, inspecting the burnt patches of fabric, before your eyes landed on one of the burns littering his skin.

He simply stared at you through the eyes of his mask, deep brown eyes burning into your form.

He was alive. He was alive. The words rang in your ears over and over again.

You stood quickly, racing to the bathroom for a first aid kit. Ghost didn’t try to stop you, watching closely as you began to strip his other glove, then his jacket, and next his shirt until he was left in the mask and a black tank top.

“This is going to sting,” you warned, dabbing some rubbing alcohol onto his burned skin, watching as he tried not to jerk away from you. There were burns along his shoulders too, and you tended to them carefully, wrapping the once you’d applied a salve to his injuries.

Your eyes settled on his once you were finished, and with a shaky hand he moved to lift the mask above his nose. “C’mere,” He mumbled, tiredly, and you leaned closer, balancing yourself with a hand on the door behind him.

His lips crashed onto yours, and you delicately cupped his chin, leaning into the affection.

“We’ve gotta go,” he said, pulling away. “Gotta help me pack the truck,” he said, stiffly attempting to sit up.

“Go? Go where? Price thought you were dead-“

“Good. We’re safer that way.”

Your eyes narrowed in confusion. “Safer?”

“They were waiting for us. Waiting for me. That was the point. Draw us out, get rid of the Ghost. They got what they wanted, now we have to run before someone decides to make sure they did the job right.”

“We should tell your team-“

“We can’t tell anyone,” he interrupted, his eyes meeting yours before looking away. “You don’t have to come with me,” he began, and your eyes widened. “If you don’t wanna run, you don’t have to, but you can’t stay here. I’ll take you to your family-“

“No.” He tilted his head at you. “I’m not abandoning you, Simon. If you go, I’m coming with you. I’m not losing you again,” you decided resolutely, tears welling up in your eyes.

His eyes seemed to soften, and he reached for your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “If that’s what you want,” he whispered.

Your answer was to press your lips on his. “I did say I wanted to see Cambridge.”

Simon nuzzled your cheek in response. “Whatever you want, love.” He murmured. He’d give you anything and everything.

“You,” you choked. “I want you.” 

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@corpsebridenightamare @15382663884 @discowizard88 @strawberryjambrrread @lieblinqs

[nicholaslefthand]

~Food Break~

Characters: Lee Jihoon x gn!reader

Genre: Fluff

TW: Kisses, established relationship, pet/nick names (Hoonie/Hoon/Jagiya/baby)

W/C: 0.5k

I was chilling on the couch watching a random show that was playing on the TV, when I noticed I was getting hungry. I groaned as I didn't want to stand up to get food, but still did because the need was too strong. So, I got up, went to the kitchen, opened the fridge, and got some ingredients out to make myself a quick snack.

I was chopping up some carrots when I remembered that I haven't seen my boyfriend in a good 7 hours as he was cooped up in his studio. 'He probably hasn't eaten since he went in there...' I thought as I took out some more ingredients to make him something too.

When I finished, I took both the plates and started walking to Jihoon's self-proclaimed home studio. I knocked as best as I could with the plates in hand and shouted: "Can I come in, Hoonie?" I waited for a response but heard none, so I opened the door with my elbow and walked in to see Hoon with noise cancelling headphones on his head. I placed the plates on the desk next to him and tapped his shoulder. He jumped and looked at me like I just made his soul leave his body. I giggle as he pulls his headphones off, "You scared me... Are you okay? Did you need something?", he asks. "I made us something to eat. And you could need a break, you've been in here for 7 hours or so..." I nod at the plates in front of us.

"Oh. Has it been that long already? Thank you, Jagiya. But...- Are we supposed to eat with our fingers?" I look down and notice the lack of chopsticks. 'Oops-!', I quickly run to get us both chopsticks and place them on the plates. "I don't know what you're talking about..- I see chopsticks on the plate." I say as I look everywhere but at him. He just smiles and shakes his head in amusement as he takes his plate and chopsticks and starts to eat. I do the same but before I take my first bite, I kiss Jihoon's cheek. He blushes a bit and continues to eat with said blush on his face. I giggle again and we both just sit and eat in silence as we enjoy each other's company.

♡︎♡︎♡︎TIᗰᗴ ՏKIᑭ♡︎♡︎♡︎

We both finish our food and place our plates on the desk again. Jihoon looks at me and holds out his hand for me to take, which I do without hesitation. He squeezes my hand and pulls it up to his face to kiss it. My face heats up at his action and he smiles and chuckles at my reaction. "Are you done for today?" I ask in a low voice to which he nods. "I'm also a bit tired. How about we go take a nap and then go out for dinner later?" I smile and nod and pull his hand, so he stands up. We both go hand-in-hand to our bedroom and get under the covers to relax in each other’s presence and sleep. "Sleep good, baby..." "You too, Hoonie.." We kiss and then fall into the soft land of dreams.

A/N: Dividers from @cafekitsune !

[adiproseprose]

‘God, I can’t wait for you to explode’

‘Just imagine this helpless piggy too big to walk’

‘No doubt she’ll be immobile soon…’

The addicting tight rush of fullness settles in my bloated gut. My third straight pitcher of weight gain shake collapses to the floor, and I struggle to shake the numbness out of my toes. If I could see them I’d know they were swollen and startlingly red, but I can’t see shit past my massive tits, hanging low to the center of my belly. I sink back into the couch and rub myself off, sausage fingers snaking into my underwear. My chins serve as a resting place for my exhausted head. 

I’ve always been something of an extremist. There was a time where I would count the calories on a baggy of baby carrots. I was a whore in every sense of the word, skinny as a pencil and duller than an eraser. I didn’t need anybody, I had the attention of every boy I made eye contact with. Skipped college and became a model, traveled all over the world. If you want, you can get my before and after shots. 45 bucks a piece, 112 vrs. 675. 

Nobody pays attention to you when you’re fat. 

I kicked the ball down the hill when my agency fired me, parents claiming I was giving their kids bulimia or some bullshit. The ball began to collect years of sugar, fat, salt and grease, hardly able to get out of bed without a mouthful of fresh endorphins. My veins swelled with lard, stomach overstretched and doubled over onto my fat padded knees. 

It was all very discouraging at first. I heard the gossip as I toddled along to my convenience store for my nightly dinner of mars bars and oven fries, about how tiny I used to be, if I was really the same girl. ‘Nobody wants to rub out a fat girl’. 

I drank a lot. Partied a lot. Had a lot of shitty, desperate sex that ended after 4 minutes with a sigh and a cigarette. Then I met this guy. He grabbed my belly and afterwards told me I could make a killing if I kept gaining weight. I told him to fuck off but I looked into it. Feedism is a deep, dark, somewhat fucked up world. But money is green, so I did some analysis. What did they like about these women, big asses, big tits, double chins? These women are making thousands of dollars just to eat. 

I piled on fat like batter in a cake tin. I’m round up top, double belly and huge boobs. Thickness in my face that I don’t love, but my ass is rounder than the moon. 

“Ohhhh…fuck *HIC*...fuck me. I might’ve had too much, guys.” I whine to the camera. I rub and shake my belly. 

“BURRPPP!” 

I like to read the comments while I masturbate. I scroll, an endless stream of aroused fans. 

‘700 bucks if you do a fourth!!111’

‘7 HUNDO!!!!!’

Over and over again this bitch. I roll my eyes. “500 dollars for another one Mr…Pigfarmer?” 

‘YES!!!’

He donates. And I fix the shake on my coffee table, bringing it to my lips. I wince. I really do not wanna throw up. 

“Gonna do this for you, Pigfarmer. Whoooo boy..” 

I down the shake in maybe 2 minutes and let the empty pitcher land on the floor with the others. “So *huff* fucking…fat. Can barely get… off the couch anymore..ughhhh…” 

‘I will feed you until your fucking feet fall off’

‘I can help you off the couch!!!’

‘I’ll feed you and fuck you until you can’t move baby’

This isn’t enough. I need to be fat enough to where anything is monetizable. Walking out to the car. Going up stairs. I’ve made a few sets of my rolling out bed, when my joints are aching and my waddle is exaggerated the most. 

I don’t get much out of this besides the money. If anything, it makes me feel gross. But I blend in effortlessly, I’ve gone so deep. I’m not a feedee. I am a fat fucking whale who happens to be fat because it makes me ridiculous amounts of money. It makes it a lot easier to smile. 

“Alright, guys, I’m gonna hop off. See you guys next time!! Love you!” 

I click. 1700 dollars from an hour stream. Not too bad. I wipe the sweat off my forehead and drum my belly. I’m numb. I’m covered in grease, shake powder and cum. I can barely make it through my day without that tight fullness now. I wheeze deeply as I contemplate what to eat for dinner.

[mattmurdock42]

Henry's special night.

Summary: Henry's had a stressful week and you help him relax

Warnings: MASSAGES, BATHTUB, COCKWARMING, FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF

WC: +- 2k

It´s been three months since Henry started to work out for his new role, August Walker. He´d wake early and go to the gym, then, he´d go straight to the set´s gym to train for his fight scenes. He usually´d be home by 7 pm, but latelly, he was arriving at 9 pm, always sanding you picutes and videos of him training when he was late, apologizing and stuff. You didn´t knew how he could manage this schedule.

This has been his routine for a while now. However, this week you noticed he was a little different. He´d get home and go straight to the shower and bed, falling asleep in seconds. He used to always dine with you and talk and cuddle in bed, so this new behaviour of his shocked you. One day, while he was showering, you passed in front of the bathroom, which was with the door open, and you saw him leaned against the wall while the water ran against his back. You couldn't´t stand this situation anymore, not when, one day, his meals that he took to the trainig secions, came untouched. You knew all his diet, he needed to eat, and a lot, otherwise he wouldn´t even be able to stand still. You decided to do something, and it would be this weekend.

This friday he made home by 7 pm, then bath and bed as always. At weekends he would always just go to the gym and for a walk on the evening. He needed to go to the gym for his job, so you didn´t intervined in that, but tonight, he was not going out. You decided to accompany him in the gym, going 7 am, instead of your usual time, 5pm. You could tell he was tired, always yawning, sitting whenever possible, and making some exercises limited.

Getting home, you both went to have your morning snacks. "Henry, i´m worried about you." He looked confused at you. "You can barely stand still for to long. This days, your food came untouched. You need to obey strictly to your diet."

"Oh, that day i just forgot to eat, darling. It´s okay." He quietly says.

You knew he wouldn´t admit he was tired, he always wanted to pass an impression of being always strong, healthy and excited, rarelly letting his guard down. Moreover, you knew you were the only one he´d confess if something was bothering him. He trusted you with his life and didn´t know how he could love you so much.

"I won´t admit this situation to keep going. So, today i planned a special day for you." You say with a smile. He tries to say something but you cut him, already knowing he would say something against it, but in his heart, he really wanted it. "This saturday will begin with you taking a shower and doing whatever you want until i make luch, then, you´ll take a nap until down. During evening, i have a surprise for you."

"Baby girl, you know i don´t like surprises, even if they are nice, so tell me what it is." He pleaded.

"No baby girl today. Now, you are my baby boy, and will do as you are told. About the surprise, you´ll like it, don´t worry. Still, i´m not telling you." You winked.

He rolled his eyes and went to the bathroom. A few hours later lunch was ready. "Darling, do you have remedy for headache?" He asked you, because you were the one who usually had then, so his question was unexpected.

"Yes, i´m gonna get it." You go to your purse and reache him a pill. After lunch he was going to do the dishes but you sent him straight to bed, with a kiss on his lips and a soft smack on his ass, making him smile teasingly at you.

It was 4pm when you went to wake him. As you entered the bedroom you saw him shirtless tangled in your giant duvet. In your hands, you had a tray with boiled eggs, orange juice, and a sandwich of chicken with gratted carrot. The part of waking him, you left for Kal, who was standing by your side, waiting for your signal to wake his best friend. He patted the way through the bed, sniffing Henry´s feet who was out of the duvet. Henry sighed groggy, shifting in the bed. Kal got on the bed and went to lick Henry´s back. He turned to face Kal, opening his eyes and softly petting the dog´s head. Then, he turned to you. "Hello, my world." He says. You sat by his side on the bed and placed the tray on his lap. He kisses you on the cheek. "What i did to deserve this special treatment, may i know?" He asked. "Well, you worship me in every single way i could be worshiped, you give me love i didn´t know i deserved, and, the most important thing, you make me cum every week." He chuckled loud, smiling at you and saying "Well, maybe i should make you cum more, so i can always have special weekends." You grin and place your hand on his thigh, going up and down teasingly. "Maybe you should. You know, four times a week is enough for me." You joke. "Carefull with what you wish, my love. So, now it´s night, what is the surprise?"

You kissed him and gave a knowing smile, making him groan. " Now rest, dinner will be ready in a couple of hours, and you need to eat, my baby boy. Oh! And by the way, no going for a walk tonight. I´ll go with Kal to the park, but when i get home, i wanna see you doing nothing stressful, understood?"

"Yes, ma'am". He said with a pout.

After your walk, you put the lasagna in the oven and go to prepare things for the night. As you passed through the living room, you see your husband playing his video game. "Did your headache got better?" You asked as you seated by his side hugging his bicep. "Yes, that nap was heaven." He said as he didn´t took his eyes from the game. You untengled yourself from his arm and when you went to get up, you feel one giant arm embrace your waist and pull you backwards. You fall on Henry´s lap. With his other arm, he leans you to the side for a kiss. "Is this surprise anything that involves, i don´t know... my body? Since you comanded me to sleep all day."

"Yes, it does involve your body. But not in that way." You managed to say before your lips smashed togheter. "You are mine" he whispers as he lets you go. As you prepared the bedroom and the bathtub, you went to set the table. You both ate and did the dishes, Henry pestering you all the time, like a curious child.

"Now that everything is set on it´s place, can we go to the surprise part? It´s killing me!" He whined.

"Well, if you want it so much, lets go." He suddenly pulled you to a passionate kiss, sliding his hands with hunger to your ass, placing one between you legs, massaging your core. You break the kiss and push him away, one hand on his chest. "What have i told you? This is not the surprise." You grab his hand and guides him to the bedroom.

As he entered he saw candles everywhere and a chair by the bed. "Darling, if the surprise is not sex, then i really don´t know what it is." He says as he looked confused at you. You push him to seat on the bed. "My baby boy, i watched you on those videos that you send me of you training and i saw how stiff you were, you are to stressed. So, i´ll make you relax this night." You explain as you cup his cheek and with the pad of your thumb you massage his cheek. "Now, get naked." You command. He does as he is told. "Seat on the chair, but with your back turned to me." He straddles the chair. "hug the chair and straight your posture." As he does, you start to massage his shoulders. He flinches and let a pain sigh scape. He was too stiff. "My baby, so many knots. I can´t let you get to this state again." You start to work on it, making his shoulders go down slowly. When you were done, he inclines his head back, lips slightly parted. You grab both sides of his head and inclines it to expose his neck. You start to massage it, giving soft squeezes. You can feel his Adam´s apple. After you finish you say "Now, lay on the bad, back´s up." You straddle him and starts to work on his tensioned low back muscles, where he kept all his weight. After many minutes scrubbing and undoing knots, you went to his chest, feeling his defined abdominal muscles under your hands. You loved his broad chest, it made you feel safe and cozy. After he was entirely relaxed, you gave squeezes to his legs to release the accumulated tension.

The massage part was over. You sat beside his head on the bed and quietly says. "My baby, i´m finished." You say as you pet his head. "It´s my special night, so i demand more." He whispers, eyes still close. "Darling, your muscles are completely soft now, and the night is still not over." You took his hand and lead him to the bathroom. You had prepared the bathtub full of bubbles and soaps. "Get in there and seats in the middle." After he did, you seat behind him. Each of your legs on each side of his body. You pull him to lean on your chest. He hummes silently. "You are my favorite person on this universe. I must have been an angel in some other life to deserve you." He whispers.

"Well, i can´t say if you were or were not, but i certainlly was, because i got the most gentleman, loving, funny, smart, worshiping, prestative and handsome husband ever." You say as you place a kiss on his hair.

You both just stay there for a considerable time. After, you take a shower and go to bed.

"This was the best night of my life, dove."

"I´m glad you enjoyed it." You say as he pulls you closer, cuddling you. "You know how you were suggesting something before, then i started thinking..." You didn't finish your sentence with words, letting your actions take control. Your fingers went through his short's waistband and you grabbed his cock, already semi-hard, giving it gentle strokes. "Let me cockwarm you. I missed you these days, we didn't cuddled for so long!" You whisper, your lips hovering his. Before you could tell,he had already turned you over, back pulled to chest. You took off your pajamas and he entered you, making you gasp. Gosh, how you missed his giant cock. You both fall asleep in each other arms. The next day, you would give even more care to your baby boy.

[plantyberry]

Cloudcuckoolander Tally Masterlist

Well, gee, already 2 posts about it, I guess I'll have to do a master list-ahem.

THE APOCALYPSE!!! (Capitals required)!

A VERY SERIOUS topic!

People dying left and right, monsters escaped from literaly hell to kill you (or worse), an unlikely crew of untrustworthy teammates, a mentor figure who may or may not want to start up another apocalypse…

Indeed, the Apocalypse is very doomy. And Gloomy.

But it needs not be always so, for there is One MC who resists again and again against the forces of angst and depression!

Have you ever wanted to roleplay as a masochistic fairy obsessed with their iron lamp?

Do you have the itch to summon the Great Old Ones to try and start a massive kaiju battle?

Are you perhaps interested in escaping deadly monsters though the power of tango?

If you have answered yes to any of those questions, congratulations, for we present to you the archetype of the…

Part 1: Prologue + Chapter 1: 'My little poltergeist can't sound this sexy!' Part 2: Chapter 1-2 and 1-2-2: The Polo Club, or, 'Carrots save lives, but have you tried the apples yet?' Part 3: Chapter 1-3 and 1-3-2: The Fencing Club, or, 'If I swallow Excalibur, does that mean I'll become invulnerable?' Part 5: Chapters 1-5, 1-5-2 and 1-5-3: the Time Bubble incident, or, 'My Magic 8-Ball is on the fritz!' Part 6: Chapter 1-6, or, 'Can't I be Sir Not-Appearing-In-This-Film instead? Part 7: Chapter 1-7, or, 'An apartment on fire can be more useful than you think' Part 8: Chapter 2, or, 'We dine well here in Camelot. We eat ham and jam and spam a lot!' Part 9: Chapter 2-2, or, "But I'm not a serial killer and I don't have a gun, so what now?!" Part 10: Chapter 2-3, or, 'I cast: Summon soulmate!'

[they-call-me-emmy]

The Past is The Past 3

Part 1 and 2 on my account <3

Tara Carpenter x Fem!Reader

Summary: Tara was faced with her 3 ghostface, and this time got so seriously injured she was in a coma. When she wakes up, she has no memory of the past 3 years...including you, her girlfriend.

Notes: Imagine this as our gals scream 7...since Jenna apparently quit and left me fucking DYING

Warnings: Uh, injury, violence, blood, our boy ghostyface with knives. Coma and memory loss if thats even a warning. Swearing. Uhm. Shitty 7th grade writing.

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Tara pushed the food around her plate using her fork. She'd barely eaten a bite all dinner, busy glaring at Sam and avoiding any sort of eye contact with Y/N.

"So." Sam began, putting a hand to her mouth and pausing, to finish chewing. "Y/N. How's life been treating you? I haven't seen you around in a while."

There was a second of silence as Y/N finished her food.

"Fine." She stated, setting her fork down on her napkin. "Work's been rough, but nothing besides that."

Sam nodded. "You work at that bookstore, right? The one with the bunny in the window? I drive by it on my way to the grocery store."

Tara had no idea what they were talking about. She hadn't gone shopping since she'd come home. What bookstore? What bunny? It was like listening to people speaking nonsense.

"Yeah. That's the one. Shifts have been longer recently, we're low on staff."

Sam nodded, continuing to eat. Y/N cleared her throat.

"Tara," Tara startled from her daze at the sound of her name, in Y/N's voice no less. "Sam's been telling me your getting back into horror? Is that true?"

Tara glared at Sam.

"I've always been into horror."

Y/N nodded, pursing her lips, sensing the tension in the room. The need to just...not talk.

"I was-" Y/N cleared her throat and took a sip of water. "I was wondering if maybe you wanted to watch some of your favorites...y'know, the few we watched in the last year you really enjoyed? I wouldn't mind re-watching them with you."

Tara couldn't help but feel weird. She's watched movies with this girl. She'd watched horror movies. She'd watched horror movies and enjoyed them. With this girl? This girl she hardly knew now?

"Maybe."

Y/N nodded.

"I've been busy lately." Tara pushed a cooked carrot into her napkin. She didn't like those.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Tara, you've been sitting on your ass for the past week-"

Tara suddenly stood up. "I'm finished. I'm going to go wash the dishes." She took Sam and Y/N's plates and left without another word.

Tara knew they'd talk the moment she left. She hovered at the door, running the sink in the background so they'd think she was cleaning. Maybe they'd mention the big thing tonight. Maybe they'd say something that would finally help her understand her past.

"I'm sorry she's being an ass." Sam's voice was muffled through the kitchen door.

"It's fine. I wasn't expecting a heartwarming welcome. I mean, come on, I'm practically a stranger to her. And it's hard on her too, Sam. Remember she's struggling too."

Tara would have felt mad if anyone else had said this, as if they pitied her and felt sorry for her state of mind. But hearing those words, those words in Y/N's sweet voice...felt like reassurance that someone understand how she'd been struggling.

"I know...I'm trying to get her to...connect. Y'know? Re-enforce those bonds...god, you two were like peas in a pod. I can't imagine how long it'll take for that to be back, especially with her new...attitude." Sam sounded empathetic, but there was still a twinge of annoyance in her voice.

"I'm not expecting it to just click again...but I can wait. I'm assuming you haven't told her?" Y/N asked.

Tara could feel her heart beat a little faster. Was this it? Was she about to learn what this secret was that everyone seemed so desperate to avoid?

"No. I don't feel like it's the right time. I mean, you see the way she is. Putting that much more pressure on her is bound to do no good."

"You have to tell her at some point." Y/N said. "You and her would both prefer you telling her rather then her randomly learning one day, or even worse, getting a flash of memory from it. The doctor did say those happen, especially with traumatic experiences, at least in her case."

"I don't feel like now is the right time."

"Soon, Sam. Please. The girl deserves to know. This is important."

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I'm a slut for comments people.